WHY THIS BLOG?

I AM PARCA'S CHOSEN:
Parca is the Roman Goddess of Childbirth and Destiny and after you get to know me, you will see why I believe she has, without doubt, made me her Poster Child. I deal with the odd serious issue but for the most part, my posts are just some cheeky fun, reviews of favorite shows, and true stories that will make you laugh out loud (or run screaming...I don't know you well enough to predict your behavior). You'll find satire with the odd parody tossed in....and most definitely a generous helping of hyperbole, with a dollop of facetiousness.

I am Canadian so expect a bit of politeness too. Sorry.

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1) MY eBOOKS CAN BE FOUND ON AMAZON HERE:
DENISE ON AMAZON
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3) My website:denisesevierfries.com
4) My Photo-Art Youtube Trailer is here too.

5) My old monthly column: The Lighter Side of Self Publishing
6) Outlander Series Facebook forum: the popular book/tv series group I am admin on, is The BEST and BIGGEST with over 86,000+ members! Come join us! *click on bold red words

Saturday, February 18, 2017

DELAYLANDER: THE OUTRAGEOUS REASONS S3 WON'T START UNTIL SEPTEMBER 2017!

SEASON 3 OF OUTLANDER WON'T BE SHOWN UNTIL SEPTEMBER 2017! DELAYLANDER HAS BEGUN!

The words were like Geillis' nails gouging out the eyes of millions of shocked fans.

Oh, how wasted the tears and agony of those who'd lamented the distant April release. Now betrayed! April, now their dearly departed friend (a little Shakespeareanesque agnst *wink*)

BUT WHY?

Ear-splitting laments echoed throughout the fandom, reverberating off the rafters of broken hearts...gutting the Faithful.

After a LOT of stealth undercover work, bribery and MI6-like maneuvering worthy of Captain Frank Randall himself (my not-so-secret-crush)...I got the poop scoop on WHY the delay.

Don't shoot the messenger, but here are the outrageous reasons we have to wait:

1) CRUISE SHIPS STALKING THE CAST AND CREW


It didn't seem to matter where Ron Moore and Starz decided to shoot...the die-hard fans found them out. NO secret location was secret enough.

Paying up to $1,000.00 per night, hundreds of fans boarded 'OutCruises' ships and bellied up to the show filming sites like drunks to a free-beer bar, and not only gawked, screeched and took millions of illegal photos, a few escaped the confines of the fanships and snuck into the private dressing rooms of Sam, Cait, Tobias etc... when they were off taping scenes and tried on their underwear (sometimes cutting off bits for mementos). Too many interrupted takes and too many holey undies would set the crew off to another location.

It took 21 different locations to shoot this season, where only 4 had been allocated.

Victoria's Secret and Fruit of the Loom unmentionables were bulk-shipped in as well.

2) SAM LOST HIS VOICE FOR 5 MONTHS



A combination of yelling at OutCruise Fans to bring back his underwear as they scampered back to the fanships, plus a special scene where Jamie Fraser sings a robust aria from Doneztti's 'Daughter of the Regiment': 'Ah mes amis - Pour mon ame', set the scene for Sam to completely lose his voice. We could not obtain a recording of Sam singing, but here is Pavarotti with his much quieter rendition:

It was obviously the 3 High C's that did it for Sam, who, I hear, hit them clearer that the Maestro ever did. *jaw drops in awe and wonder*

Sam was reportedly so jealous of Caitriona's Boogie Oogie Bugle Boy (2:20 mark) singing stint, he insisted on a go at it himself, and chose a light piece the fans could tap their toe too. He calls it a Scottish ditty. We aren't sure why.

Sam recovered and we all look forward to the episode, now tilted "The Scottish Tenor".

3) BILL SHATNER CRASHED THE SHOW: MADE HIMSELF JAMIE'S SON



Touting himself as 'Outlander's William', Bill Shanter tried to get on the show by making himself William...Jamie's son. Quoted as saying 'Only a true William can PLAY a William. Age is all in the magic of acting...not a problem. I can do 17...hey, let go of my arm...put that taser down!"

Shatner and Sam Heughan are reportedly friendly...on Twitter...but the friendship was stretched to a thin wire after Sam saw this billboard near his condo in New York.

It was he who called authorities.

4)  CAITRIONA IS A NARCOLEPTIC

In a picture leaked by concerned cast mates, we have learned that Cait's narcolepsy has increased to the point where she can only act for 2 hours a day. This delayed production.

A lot.


Cait on set with an extra who is a narco as well 

More pictures of proof have flowed into my office, but I don't feel comfortable showing you them as Cait usually sleeps in the nude. However, I do have shots of her pets:
Cait's cat: Yawnsy


Cait's dog: Snoozer


Cait's ostrich: Lady Apnea



5)  SAM SHAVED HIS HEAD

While on hiatus, Sam and some old school buddies got drunk, got matching tattoos (cant say where *snicker*) and all three of them had their heads shaved by a 4th buddy. Here is the picture Sam took of his mates after the deed was done:


...and here is Sam with the Starz make-up team's attempt to glue some fake hair down as a base for a red wig...arrows point to Special Glue Pins:






Note the orange/brown 'tan' Sam got from passing out under a heat lamp at Giuseppe's Diner. They will have to write that into the script.



6) THEY COULDN'T FIND DIANA

There are few available details to this story but suffice it to say there were 4 mitigating factors:
1) Stress
2) Tequila
3) A trip to Brazil
4) Did I mention Tequila?

Diana WAS finally found having a hell of a time (see picture below) and her husband and Herself came back to Scotland a little more relaxed and a lot more flexible.





7) CAITRIONA BECAME ADDICTED: TO WHITE FUDGE


They couldn't keep enough of it on set. 2 bags a week was a slow week for Cait...and the show came to a FULL stop if she ran out.



Here we see Cait during a break...white fudge in hand. Notice the scoop... and the almost mad protective look of defiance in her focused stare, challenging anyone to get between her and her stash. And yes...her dress at the '69th Annual Cannes Film Festival' was indeed made up of White Fudge Wrappers. NOT a surprise once you know her weakness.



8) TOBIAS SINGLE-HANDEDLY INCAPACITATED EVERY FEMALE ON THE SET


Unaware of the power Tobias Menzies has over women, Ron Moore innocently wrote a touching scene (shown above) where Claire gives birth to Brianna and a besotted Frank becomes a twitterpated mass of smittenhood and his utter and completely believable performance caused women to either spontaneously orgasm or lactate. One woman soaked her entire sweater and hadn't even had children yet. One was a virgin...but wasn't sure anymore. And another was so completely sexually satisfied every day that her husband came down to the set with a shotgun demanding to see 'that Frank dude' so he could make sure his wife was telling the truth that they'd never even touched! After several days worth of takes with little change, the set was ultimately closed to just the actors and 1 male cameraman who was immune to Tobias's charms (although he did admit to a half-woody and few tears).

The delay here is that Ron and co. must re-write the script to ensure Tobias doesn't cause such havoc again. It is taking longer than expected.
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You may take this article as gospel, or you can SING gospel...but only one will show the world how well-adjusted you are. 
*grin* 



Tuesday, February 7, 2017

OUTLANDER: WAS FRANK RANDALL MURDERED? And why?




Was Captain Frank Randall, MI6 Secret Agent and unsung tragic hero of Outlander, MURDERED?

I think he may have been.

Was it an accident involving 'black ice'...or a heart attack? I say foul play.

I run the largest and BEST Outlander facebook page (OS) and I posited this theory that I wanted to share.

Being on #TeamFrank is a lonely place...but this may make you inclined to join...or at least give you pause to rethink what you thought you knew.

Here is my post...let me know what YOU think in the comments section below or on OS.
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January 07/ 2017: OS Facebook Post

I think Frank was murdered.

If you have read 'Leaf' and know of his being an MI6 British Intelligence Secret Agent. (the same as 007) and of Roger's father's [Jeremiah] Time Travel experience etc... you will know that Frank was a loving, kind, thoughtful man who felt it all and suffered deeply for his part in trying to save his Country, and the lives of so many others, during the war.

You will know that even after 2 years of not seeing his Claire, he touched his ring lovingly when he thought of her. You will know that he may have had some inkling into the TT and this opens an important door into why Frank may have been protecting Claire and Bree (who are TT and therefore worth kidnapping and examining/using for evil) and why so many red herrings could be employed in the sad second half of their marriage-story together. It would serve Frank well to have Claire believe what she wanted and not get too nosy in his comings-and-goings and late night calls etc....

Any MI6 agent...and especially the top dog like Captain Frank Randall, would be privy to any danger Claire and Bree would be in and perhaps, just perhaps, he felt they were in grave danger when he wanted to take Bree away...KNOWING Claire would follow.


And perhaps he was killed trying to protect them. This is obviously just my speculation ... but one theory I am warming too.

He was too important in the war and was the first to reveal proof about the Nazi concentration camps which drove the Allied Forces more passionately than ever...and that made him enemies. And if he knew about Roger's father's TT...which he may have as he was the one who sent him on that mission, it would make him even more enemies and people who would want that info.

I think Frank deserves a noble death...one in which he died for the ones he loved...and I believe (hope!) DG will give him one.

Frank is a man that people think they know, but they don't... not even close. And I LOVE Diane for making this a mystery to us...but one I hope she solves for us!

ADDED Feb 24 2017: OMG!!! LOOK AT WHAT DIANA HAS WRITTEN ABOUT FRANK'S DEATH!! I HAVE JUST BECOME AWARE OF THIS...POSTED ON COMPU-SERVE MARCH 12 2016:
NOT 100% PROOF...BUT HOLY SHIT!!

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The base for this theory: for further reading on what other 'proof' I have that makes a solid holding for this theory, read here: OUTLANDER: Frank Randall's Lipsticky Collar, Hidden Love Note, Women Callers and Purported Affairs/Indiscretions/Confessions EXPLAINED!
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Friday, February 3, 2017

OUTLANDER: POLICE WANTED POSTERS 'NOT ACTUAL SUSPECT' *Graham Norton Inspired

I was watching the Graham Norton Show recently and the promo for the new Trainspotting2 movie was on (worth seeing JUST for Ewan McGregor alone!) and there was a part where they talked about a crime that had been committed in the USA (Utah) and the eye-witness said the criminal looked like Trainspotting actor Ewen Bremner... so instead of using a Police Sketch Artist, they just posted this around town and in the station:



Bloody funny stuff... that got me wondering what kind of Wanted Poster and crime would our wonderful Outlander Characters' looks inspire? Let me see...

























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I MAY POST MORE...AS I AM INSPIRED...OR BORED...OR BOTH.
CHEERS!